Brought home by my mom, u were adorable. I tried my hardest not to love u. U were an obstinate and mean little puppy with razor sharp teeth but mom wanted me to train u. After numerous sessions of several different types of classes, u relented, knew we weren´t out to hurt u and finally agreed that we knew best. And then came the love and adoration. You “smiled”, wiggled your whole body and butt and cried every time I came home. I didn´t know why. I didn´t feel worthy. But YOU chose ME to be your mommy. Every time I turned around, u were there. U were faithful and loyal to the end. I did my best to return your unconditional love. You fought long and hard and I know it was your love that kept you going for so long. As even Dr. Jo said, “ She had such a big heart”. Both literally and figuratively. But as long as u were still happy, I was too. I miss u terribly already - my best friend and baby girl. And as I said... you better be there waiting when I get there.
Love,
Your Mommy.
8/23/12
Oh and I added u to the Rainbow Bridge list. But u already knew that. <3
___________________________
Miniature Pinscher is a hardy little fellow, who is proud, and courageous. They are loyal to their masters, spirited and alert, with high energy. Intelligent, lively and brave.
___________________________
A Parting Prayer
Dear Lord, please open your gates
and call St. Francis
to come escort this beloved companion
across the Rainbow Bridge.
Assign her to a place of honor,
for she has been a faithful servant
and has always done her best to please me.
Bless the hands that send her to you,
for they are doing so in love and compassion,
freeing her from pain and suffering.
Grant me the strength not to dwell on my loss.
Help me remember the details of her life
with the love she has shown me.
And grant me the courage to honor her
by sharing those memories with others.
Let her remember me as well
and let her know that I will always love her.
And when it's my time to pass over into your paradise,
please allow her to accompany those
who will bring me home.
Thank you, Lord,
for the gift of her companionship
and for the time we've had together.
And thank you, Lord,
for granting me the strength
to give her to you now.
Amen.
- © Brandy Duckworth, 1998
Brandy's webpage address is: http://www.otch.com/brandy.htm
8/24/12
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In the mornings and the evenings, the quiet makes me think of u and makes me
sad. U would always wake me to get your peanut butter (with your pills) and
pester me for your bedtime snack(s). I'm not used to waking on my own without u
staring at me or being noisy or kicking me to wake me up.
When dining at a place with outside seating, I noted a couple people had their
dogs with them. Excited, I started to say, " I could bring...!" but caught myself before
finishing the sentence.
Driving home from Daddy's house before work, I always came home first to drop u
off. As I was doing this the other morning, I realized that I no longer "needed" to stop at home first anymore. And that made me sad.
I'm not used to u being gone yet I guess. I miss u.
8/25/12
___________________________________
I lit a candle for u tonight Jadie. An online ceremony of sorts. I wasn't sure what to expect. Thought it would be weird but oddly, it wasn't. This is what was said:
The Online Monday Candle Ceremony text:
We begin with "The Journey" © Crystal Ward Kent http://www.journeyforanimals.com
When you bring a pet into your life, you begin a journey - a journey that will bring you more love and devotion than you have ever known, yet also test your strength and courage.
If you allow, the journey will teach you many things, about life, about yourself, and most of all, about love. You will come away changed forever, for one soul cannot touch another without leaving its mark. Along the way, you will learn much about savoring life's simple pleasures - jumping in leaves, snoozing in the sun, the joys of puddles, and even the satisfaction of a good scratch behind the ears.
[“for one soul cannot touch another without leaving its mark.” I LOVE THAT. THAT IS SO TRUE. U DEFINITELY LEFT YOUR MARK.]
If you spend much time outside, you will be taught how to truly experience every element, for no rock, leaf, or log will go unexamined, no rustling bush will be overlooked, and even the very air will be inhaled, pondered, and noted as being full of valuable information. Your pace may be slower - except when heading home to the food dish - but you will become a better naturalist, having been taught by an expert in the field.
[I HAD TO GET AN EXTENDABLE LEASH FOR U TO BE ABLE TO STOP AND SNIFF ON OUR RUNS. U NEVER STRAYED TOO FAR BEHIND OR AHEAD THOUGH. THEN IN THE END, I HAD TO TRY TO SLOW U DOWN ON OUR WALKS WHEN U GOT SICK. U WEREN´T ALLOWED TO RUN ANYMORE AND WERE ONLY SUPPOSED TO WALK AT A SLOW PACE. FUNNY THING WAS THAT U DIDN´T KNOW U WERE SICK AND DIDN´T LIKE THE SLOW PACE.]
Too many times we hike on automatic pilot, our goal being to complete the trail rather than enjoy the journey. We miss the details - the colorful mushrooms on the rotting log, the honeycomb in the old maple snag, the hawk feather caught on a twig. Once we walk as a dog does, we see a whole new world. We stop; we browse the landscape, we kick over leaves, peek in tree holes, look up, down, all around. And we learn what any dog knows: that nature has created a marvelously complex world that is full of surprises, that each cycle of the seasons bring ever changing wonders, each day an essence all its own.
[ISN´T THAT THE TRUTH.]
Even from indoors you will find yourself more attuned to the world around you. You will find yourself watching summer insects collecting on a screen. (How bizarre they are! How many kinds there are!), or noting the flick and flash of fireflies through the dark. You will stop to observe the swirling dance of windblown leaves, or sniff the air after a rain. It does not matter that there is no objective in this; the point is in the doing, in not letting life's most important details slip by.
You will find yourself doing silly things that your pet-less friends might not understand: spending thirty minutes in the grocery aisle looking for the cat food brand your feline must have, buying dog birthday treats, or driving around the block an extra time because your pet enjoys the ride. You will roll in the snow, wrestle with chewie toys, bounce little rubber balls till your eyes cross, and even run around the house trailing your bathrobe tie - with a cat in hot pursuit - all in the name of love.
Your house will become muddier and hairier. You will wear less dark clothing and buy more lint rollers. You may find dog biscuits in your pocket or purse, and feel the need to explain that an old plastic shopping bag adorns your living room rug because your cat loves the crinkly sound.
[U DIDN´T SHED MUCH, THANKFULLY. NOW THOSE KITTIES ON THE OTHER HAND....!]
You will learn the true measure of love - the steadfast, undying kind that says, "It doesn't matter where we are or what we do, or how life treats us as long as we are together." Respect this always. It is the most precious gift any living soul can give another. You will not find it often among the human race.
[AS SICK AS U WERE, U ALWAYS HAD A SMILE AND A TAIL WAG FOR ME. AND WHEN I WASN´T WITH U, I ALWAYS WONDERED HOW U WERE AND MISSED U BECAUSE I KNEW U WERE MISSING ME.]
And you will learn humility. The look in my dog's eyes often made me feel ashamed. Such joy and love at my presence. She saw not some flawed human who could be cross and stubborn, moody or rude, but only her wonderful companion. Or maybe she saw those things and dismissed them as mere human foibles, not worth considering, and so chose to love me anyway.
[OMG YES. I ABSOLUTELY DID NOT FEEL WORTHY OF SUCH LOVE!]
If you pay attention and learn well, when the journey is done, you will be not just a better person, but the person your pet always knew you to be - the one they were proud to call beloved friend.
I must caution you that this journey is not without pain. Like all paths of true love, the pain is part of loving. For as surely as the sun sets, one day your dear animal companion will follow a trail you cannot yet go down.
And you will have to find the strength and love to let them go. A pet's time on earth is far too short - especially for those that love them. We borrow them, really, just for a while, and during these brief years they are generous enough to give us all their love, every inch of their spirit and heart, until one day there is nothing left.
The cat that only yesterday was a kitten is all too soon old and frail and sleeping in the sun. The young pup of boundless energy wakes up stiff and lame, the muzzle now gray. Deep down we somehow always knew that journey would end. We knew that if we gave our hearts they would be broken.
[I DIDN´T WANT TO BUT I COULDN´T RESIST HER. I AM GLAD TO HAVE HAD HER FOR THE TIME THAT I DID BUT IT IS JUST TOO SHORT A TIME.]
But give them we must for it is all they ask in return. When the time comes, and the road curves ahead to a place we cannot see, we give one final gift and let them run on ahead - young and whole once more. "Godspeed, good friend," we say, until our journey comes full circle and our paths cross again.
[THAT´S WHAT DR. JO SAID. SHE CALLED IT MY FINAL GIFT TO HER. I GUESS IT WAS THOUGH IT SURE DOESN´T FEEL LIKE IT. THE CLOSING TO THE CEREMONY REALLY HIT IT ON THE HEAD: “CLOSING: I have sent you on a journey to a land free from pain, not because I did not love you, but because I loved you too much to force you to stay. “ YOU WERE WITH US LONGER THAN ANYONE EVER THOUGHT U WOULD BE. YOUR LITTLE BODY WAS GETTING TIRED AND U WERE ON SO MANY MEDICATIONS. I DON´T KNOW HOW U MADE IT AS LONG AS YOU DID BUT I COULDN´T LET U SUFFER EVEN FOR JUST ONE DAY.]
We continue with a selection from the website's collection of Healing and Inspirational poetry: Beyond The Rainbow by Cate Guyan © 1995
As much as I loved the life we had and all the times we played,
I was so very tired and knew my time on earth would fade.
I saw a wondrous image then of a place that's trouble-free
Where all of us can meet again to spend eternity.
I saw the most beautiful Rainbow, and on the other side
Were meadows rich and beautiful -- lush and green and wide!
And running through the meadows as far as the eye could see
Were animals of every sort as healthy as could be!
My own tired, failing body was fresh and healed and new
And I wanted to go run with them, but I had something left to do.
I needed to reach out to you, to tell you I'm alright
That this place is truly wonderful, then a bright Glow pierced the night.
'Twas the Glow of many Candles shining bright and strong and bold
And I knew then that it held your love in its brilliant shades of gold.
For although we may not be together in the way we used to be,
We are still connected by a cord no eye can see.
So whenever you need to find me, we're never far apart
If you look beyond the Rainbow and listen with your heart.
[I SURE HOPE THERE´S SUCH A PLACE. U DESERVE IT. I THINK OF U OFTEN. I TRY NOT TO BECAUSE SOMETIMES IT´S NOT A CONVENIENT TIME TO BE SAD. I HOPE TO SEE U IN MY DREAMS. LOVE AND MISS U. XOXO]
And now, The Candle Ceremony..
THE MONDAY CANDLE CEREMONY...... WE GATHER TOGETHER TO HONOR AND REMEMBER OUR PETS
Tonight, Monday, we join hands, hearts and souls across the land as one large extended family to pray for our sick and dying pets and to pay tribute to our furbabies who have gone ahead to Rainbow Bridge.
Someday, we will meet them again, with hugs, tears and kisses, as we walk together, in eternity, to our new home.
Until that blessed day, we honor these precious souls and remember them with the warm glow of flickering candles, sending a message of love, light and healing, and the faith to believe in miracles.
PRAYER: God, Creator of all living things, we ask that as we light our candles, the healing warmth of love will flow into the brokenhearted who are tending their ailing pets.
Give to them Your strength and comfort. We also pray that the soft glow of light will part the clouds of grief and sorrow to surround our furbabies at the Bridge.
May excitement REIGN SUPREME as wagging tails, ecstatic purrs and flapping feathers feel our gentle touch once again. May they know the gratitude we hold in our hearts for their faithfulness and gift of unconditional love as they are forever remembered.
We are temporarily separated for only a short while. The silver cord that connects us through time and space can never be broken. AMEN.
CANDLE 1: PERSONAL FURBABY.... Anything you wish to say..... I will not look back for there is sorrow. I will not look for today for there is longing. I will look forward for there is OUR tomorrow.
CANDLE 2: FURBABIES OF FRIENDS AND FAMILY.... Read the names of those who are ill or have gone on before us as a tribute to them and their loving parents. As we all meet here, our Bridgekids will be meeting all newcomers, easing their way.
CANDLE 3: FOR ACKNOWLEDGMENT AND PEACE...In honor of all the homeless, forgotten, abandoned, abused animals. For the nameless furchildren who gave their lives for others, for research and as a result of humankind's inhumanity. May the Higher Powers that be forgive the cruelty. We light this candle for them.
As our lights shine brightly through the galaxy, may the angels smile upon us, and know that for a brief moment, we have put aside worldly differences to bond as ONE.
CLOSING: I have sent you on a journey to a land free from pain, not because I did not love you, but because I loved you too much to force you to stay.
MOMENT OF SILENCE. ......"Blessed are they that mourn, for they will be comforted." Love, light and healing to all. Amen.
The candles being lit tonight;
Cast a soft and welcome flame.
And draw our loved ones to the light,
As we call to them by name.
Imagine spirits taking flight,
For a moment our souls entwine.
Say not Good Night, but in some Brighter Time
Bid them all- Good Morning.
- - - - - - - - -
A beautiful message. It was more moving than I thought it was going to be, Jadie. I lit a candle for u tonight. I love u and miss u. Will post more tomorrow. <3
8/27/12
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I went for my first run today without u on the trails in the park u liked so much. I'd stopped running them when u got sick. Didn't want to be there without u. I thought of u and wished u were with me. I sat on the bench by the pond after my run. Yes the same one on my FB page with u and the ducks, where we shared pot roast last Thursday. I miss u but will run those trails for u because at the end u wanted to and couldn't. I will run them and remember you.
I felt like I could run forever - kinda like u would always not be ready to stop at the end of our runs.
I got u back from DeJohn's today. I'm glad to have u home with me again. I love your little paw prints and nose prints. They made me cry but I'm glad to have them. And your little fur clippings. Love and miss u, Mommy.
8/28/12
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I still miss u. My passenger seat is empty where I'd usually have your little booster seat. But I'm not so sad anymore. Maybe because I asked people at my church to pray for me on the prayer list. I hope they didn't think it was a silly request.
I find myself wanting to hug Tuli more. She comes to visit sometimes. I find myself wishing she'd come more often. Thinking of taking her for a walk in the park. Not sure if she'd like it, but we'll see.
Love and kisses, Mommy
9/2/12
Was looking at pics on Min pin lovers website. I see u and your beautiful expression in some of the puppies faces. Love u and miss u Potch.
9/10/12
Still missin' you. Took Tuli to the park. She hated it. She's such a homebody. Not the adventurer you were. But then again, you experienced a lot more than she did at a younger age. Miss my little running buddy and think of you when I run the trails. It's getting to be fall here pretty soon. Good running weather. I will look for u on the trail and in my dreams. Love u, Mommy.
9/17/12
I think of u often baby girl. This Sunday was a beautiful fall day. I wish u were here to share it with. I saw a big wild turkey and some deer. The yard runneth over with chipmunks and squirrels this fall as u are not here to chase them away. Love and miss u. xoxo
10/15/12
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